Oscar Kilo have been working with Nicole Ratcliffe the founder of Baby2sleep to provide additional support for families with very young children.
From the significant amount of work we have done on sleep, fatigue and recovery, we know how crucial sleep is to mental and physical health.
Often for new parents sleep can be in very short supply, making it a real challenge to cope, especially when returning to work. Working with Nicole we have produced a number of short videos which we hope will make life a little easier for families with young children.
Below you will find five videos covering different topics relating to sleep and young children. Please feel free to work your way through this content, Nicole gives some great advice and tips to help you and your young child sleep better.
Preparing to be a parent
Hi, I'm Nicole, a qualified sleep coach and mum of two, and I just want to say congratulations on the start of your new journey. Whether you're expecting one baby or multiples, your first or your tenth baby, you are about to embark on a life-changing journey. Parenthood can be full of joy, but it can also be overwhelmingly hard.
So one of the reasons we've created this online learning for you is there's often a missing bridge between I'm pregnant or we're going to adopt to we have a baby. Understanding more about what's coming can help you feel better prepared, maybe even prevent a few surprises along the way. So let's talk about some key things to consider now.
Preparing for the birth and post-birth. Firstly, if you or your partner are pregnant, let's talk about your birth plan. Having a plan is great and it can be so helpful to think about what kind of birth you like, whether it's a water birth, minimal intervention, or you are happy to be prescribed the drugs if you need them.
But flexibility here is essential because every birth is unique and no one can know what their tolerance will be until they are in that moment. Things can change quickly during labour and it's important to know all your options so that you can choose what's best for you and your baby. You may need pain relief, an epidural, stitches, or a c-section if that's what the situation requires.
So go ahead and make your birth plan. Make more than one if you need to, but be kind to yourself if things don't go exactly as expected. So with that in mind, preparing for various outcomes is so important to give you the best start should things not quite go to plan.
It's always better to be over-prepared than under-prepared as you can always cancel support, but it's much harder to find it last minute. It's better to plan to have support for six weeks post- birth than to presume that you'll be up and about at baby classes in just a few days. Building a support network.
It takes a village to raise a child so it is important to think about what your village looks like and consider if you even have one. Once you are home with your new baby, having a strong support system can make all the difference. Today many of us live far from family so we need to find and create our own village.
Think about who you might want as part of your support network. This could include friends and family, work colleagues, perhaps you know someone in the police who is having or has just had a baby, baby class chums or professionals like cleaners and postnatal doulas who can help look after you and the baby. It's the small things that make the world of difference to you in these early days, like having a shower, taking a nap or eating a hot meal.
Preparing for visitors and setting boundaries. You are likely to have visitors wanting to meet your new baby which is lovely but it is important that you get to remain in control so you don't feel like you're hosting a party for your baby rather than being the parent who's just gone through a huge event and needs a bit of looking after. Point them in the direction of the kettle rather than you being the host while they enjoy the baby cuddles.
Ask people to help with the cooking and the cleaning and be okay with the fact that your house may look disheveled for a while. Health visitors do not expect to see a spotless home as they expect you and your partner if you have one to be focused on your baby in those early days. You'll be recovering and adjusting to your new roles as parents and it's okay to ask people to bring food and help with the chores or simply hold the baby while you rest.
This is your time to be taken care of and accept any help that is offered. Consider batch cooking you know and stocking your freezer with healthy meals that are easy to cook before the baby arrives. Use meals delivery services or have some disposable dishes on hand.
These little choices reduce stress and they give you more time to focus on what's truly important. Accept that things may be messy and that's completely fine. Planning for second parent leave.
If you have a partner this is a great time to talk about how you'll work together as new parents. If you are the one that's taking second parental leave discuss how you would like to bond with your baby. Nappy changes offer a wonderful opportunity to bond.
This time together involves eye contact, touch and vocal communication and this boosts our love hormone oxytocin as does spending time connecting through skin to skin. One of you may need to take on more of the household tasks so that your partner can rest. Speak to your HR team to find out what your statutory parental leave looks like and look into further entitlements so you can plan how best to use them.
The first few days are what to expect. So after the birth the fourth trimester begins. A time for you and your baby to enjoy being in your own newborn bubble.
Your baby will be adjusting to life outside the womb which can make for some unsettled nights and your baby may want to be close to you especially in the evening which is also known as the witching hour which is more like the witching hours. So prepare for lots of cuddles and a bit less sleep. If you're breastfeeding your baby may cluster feed to build up your milk supply, lower the lighting to help kick off the melatonin which is the sleepy hormone, pop a film on and accept that you may be on the safer for the evening while your baby cluster feeds and enjoys bonding with you.
If formula feeding and there are two of you take it in turns to snuggle and feed your baby and use the time to have skin to skin. If breastfeeding once baby is fed and if there is a second parent they can enjoy cuddle time with them while the other parent gets some sleep or has a
relaxing bath perhaps. Communication with your partner.
Communication in advance of your baby's arrival is vitally important. Discuss what is important to each of you and see if you can find ways to plan this in. Discuss feeding methods such as breastfeeding, formula feeding, combi feeding.
Plan how you're going to get rest and accept that you are both going to be sleep deprived so emotions and feelings may be more heightened. Emotion regulation when you are deprived of sleep is difficult enough. If you happen to have worked shifts in the police you will know all about it but throw in hormones, family and a life-changing event it naturally becomes harder to manage.
Also if you have a partner who happens to work in the service and is still working shifts this can make it more challenging. Having this awareness in advance can mean that a short response gets met with support rather than that return jibe. Remember you are not alone on this journey and that asking for help is a strength not a weakness.
We aren't meant to do this alone.
Transcribed by TurboScribe.ai.
So one of the reasons we've created this online learning for you is there's often a missing bridge between I'm pregnant or we're going to adopt to we have a baby. Understanding more about what's coming can help you feel better prepared, maybe even prevent a few surprises along the way. So let's talk about some key things to consider now.
Preparing for the birth and post-birth. Firstly, if you or your partner are pregnant, let's talk about your birth plan. Having a plan is great and it can be so helpful to think about what kind of birth you like, whether it's a water birth, minimal intervention, or you are happy to be prescribed the drugs if you need them.
But flexibility here is essential because every birth is unique and no one can know what their tolerance will be until they are in that moment. Things can change quickly during labour and it's important to know all your options so that you can choose what's best for you and your baby. You may need pain relief, an epidural, stitches, or a c-section if that's what the situation requires.
So go ahead and make your birth plan. Make more than one if you need to, but be kind to yourself if things don't go exactly as expected. So with that in mind, preparing for various outcomes is so important to give you the best start should things not quite go to plan.
It's always better to be over-prepared than under-prepared as you can always cancel support, but it's much harder to find it last minute. It's better to plan to have support for six weeks post- birth than to presume that you'll be up and about at baby classes in just a few days. Building a support network.
It takes a village to raise a child so it is important to think about what your village looks like and consider if you even have one. Once you are home with your new baby, having a strong support system can make all the difference. Today many of us live far from family so we need to find and create our own village.
Think about who you might want as part of your support network. This could include friends and family, work colleagues, perhaps you know someone in the police who is having or has just had a baby, baby class chums or professionals like cleaners and postnatal doulas who can help look after you and the baby. It's the small things that make the world of difference to you in these early days, like having a shower, taking a nap or eating a hot meal.
Preparing for visitors and setting boundaries. You are likely to have visitors wanting to meet your new baby which is lovely but it is important that you get to remain in control so you don't feel like you're hosting a party for your baby rather than being the parent who's just gone through a huge event and needs a bit of looking after. Point them in the direction of the kettle rather than you being the host while they enjoy the baby cuddles.
Ask people to help with the cooking and the cleaning and be okay with the fact that your house may look disheveled for a while. Health visitors do not expect to see a spotless home as they expect you and your partner if you have one to be focused on your baby in those early days. You'll be recovering and adjusting to your new roles as parents and it's okay to ask people to bring food and help with the chores or simply hold the baby while you rest.
This is your time to be taken care of and accept any help that is offered. Consider batch cooking you know and stocking your freezer with healthy meals that are easy to cook before the baby arrives. Use meals delivery services or have some disposable dishes on hand.
These little choices reduce stress and they give you more time to focus on what's truly important. Accept that things may be messy and that's completely fine. Planning for second parent leave.
If you have a partner this is a great time to talk about how you'll work together as new parents. If you are the one that's taking second parental leave discuss how you would like to bond with your baby. Nappy changes offer a wonderful opportunity to bond.
This time together involves eye contact, touch and vocal communication and this boosts our love hormone oxytocin as does spending time connecting through skin to skin. One of you may need to take on more of the household tasks so that your partner can rest. Speak to your HR team to find out what your statutory parental leave looks like and look into further entitlements so you can plan how best to use them.
The first few days are what to expect. So after the birth the fourth trimester begins. A time for you and your baby to enjoy being in your own newborn bubble.
Your baby will be adjusting to life outside the womb which can make for some unsettled nights and your baby may want to be close to you especially in the evening which is also known as the witching hour which is more like the witching hours. So prepare for lots of cuddles and a bit less sleep. If you're breastfeeding your baby may cluster feed to build up your milk supply, lower the lighting to help kick off the melatonin which is the sleepy hormone, pop a film on and accept that you may be on the safer for the evening while your baby cluster feeds and enjoys bonding with you.
If formula feeding and there are two of you take it in turns to snuggle and feed your baby and use the time to have skin to skin. If breastfeeding once baby is fed and if there is a second parent they can enjoy cuddle time with them while the other parent gets some sleep or has a
relaxing bath perhaps. Communication with your partner.
Communication in advance of your baby's arrival is vitally important. Discuss what is important to each of you and see if you can find ways to plan this in. Discuss feeding methods such as breastfeeding, formula feeding, combi feeding.
Plan how you're going to get rest and accept that you are both going to be sleep deprived so emotions and feelings may be more heightened. Emotion regulation when you are deprived of sleep is difficult enough. If you happen to have worked shifts in the police you will know all about it but throw in hormones, family and a life-changing event it naturally becomes harder to manage.
Also if you have a partner who happens to work in the service and is still working shifts this can make it more challenging. Having this awareness in advance can mean that a short response gets met with support rather than that return jibe. Remember you are not alone on this journey and that asking for help is a strength not a weakness.
We aren't meant to do this alone.
Transcribed by TurboScribe.ai.
Normal new parent feelings
When you first imagine life with a baby, it's natural to picture all the magical, love-filled moments, and while for most of us those are absolutely there, what we don't often talk about are those quieter moments when you can find yourself unexpectedly feeling quite lonely and down, even though you're never truly alone, or a sense of isolation when your day-to-day revolves around a little one who, as adorable and as much loved as they are, isn't quite holding up their end of the conversation. These feelings don't mean that there's something wrong with you.
These feelings are very normal. It might come from a phone call with a friend that leaves you feeling like you're missing out because your day-to-day life now revolves around baby feeding, and baby sick, and nappy changes, and they aren't the conversations that you're used to having with your old drinking buddy. You may feel financially insecure because you're living on a reduced income.
You and your partner may feel a strange sense of awkwardness about spending money, as if you've got to keep an eye on your general finances. You might feel like you aren't sure of who you are anymore. It's definitely worth having these conversations with your partner, friends, or family in advance of your baby's arrival to help lessen any insecurities that may arise or alleviate any worries that you might not yet know that you've got.
So, expectation versus reality. The reality can look different to the dream, and it's okay to mourn the loss of your pre-baby life, your connection to policing, your independence, or even the small things like just grabbing a coffee on a whim, or spending an hour just to yourself. And if you've got a partner that has returned to work, that adjustment period might feel even tougher.
This is all part of getting used to a new normal, and it takes time. Spotting the signs of postnatal depression for either parent. Now, it's essential to be aware of postnatal depression, anxiety, and psychosis, what they look like, and who it can affect.
The statistics are telling us that one in five new mums are diagnosed with some kind of postnatal depression, and one in ten dads are diagnosed with a depression as a result of having a baby. Now, the reason I'm sharing these statistics with you is so you are aware of just how common it is, and to help you understand that should you feel in any way more negative about parenthood than you thought you would, and you can't seem to shift that feeling, then it could be that there is some kind of postnatal depression kicking around, and it's absolutely okay to talk to your health visitor or GP about it. There should be no stigma attached to mental health anymore.
We know how common it is, and when hormones and life-changing events are at play, how this
can also shift things up a gear. You may speak to your GP, and what you feel may be totally normal, but it's better to check than to wait. You know you better than anyone else.
You know your partner better than anyone else. If something seems not quite within its realms of normal, then please support each other and seek support from either your GP or mental health professional. Hormones and emotional shifts.
Okay, we're going to talk about those hormones now. They play a huge part in the roller coaster of emotions that you might be feeling. In the space of a minute, you could be laughing, crying, and be furious all at the same time, and wondering what is going on.
This is totally normal, and it takes us by surprise. This is your body adjusting after a major event, so be patient with each other and be kind to yourself. Remember, these hormonal shifts are temporary, and you're both doing a great job navigating them and supporting each other.
Birth trauma or disappointment. I want to talk a bit about birth trauma and birth disappointment, as this is very personal to each individual, and it's very important to know that one person's trauma may be very different to someone else's. To some, it can be obvious in that there was a medically traumatic birth.
To others, it can simply be that the birth didn't go to plan, and they can't shape that disappointed feeling, and it's affecting their mental health. It's also important to recognise that it might not just be the birth mom who struggles with birth trauma, but the second parent watching everything unfold in front of them, while feeling helpless, can also experience trauma. If you end up with any negative feelings about the birth, please don't suffer in silence.
You can ask your midwife for a birth debrief, and if this doesn't help, you can always reach out to the BTA, that's the Birth Trauma Association, who may be able to help. You may also want to provide feedback on your experience via the local Maternity Voices Partnership or Patient Advice and Liaison Services. Talking about things is one of the best ways to lighten your mental load and start to make sense of things, so please utilise the support that is available.
Creating a network of support. One of the best things you can do is to create your own support network that is likely to include other new parents who've got similar interests to yourself. To have people to go on that journey with you can help in those solitary moments when you feel like it's just you going through something.
There are various ways to find your tribe, and a lot will depend on your personality as to which suits you best. If you're more of an introvert, you may choose to find a parent group online where people have similar interests to you. Alternatively, you may follow parent influences you like to feel a sense of solidarity.
If you're someone who needs people, then look for your local parenting groups. It could be a running group, yes they exist, baby sensory type classes, sing and sign or coffee meetups. You even get sling dance classes where you can dance with your baby in a sling.
There are dad groups where they might meet up and play football or just attend a baby class with other dads and their babies. It might be that you're looking for a specific LBGQT plus group and there will be ones in your area. If not in person, online.
You want to connect with people who you can have a conversation with that get you. So don't stick to the traditional baby classes, look for what you need. Where to get help if something feels off.
If at any point something just doesn't feel right or you're feeling persistently low, don't hesitate to reach out. Health visitors, GPs and local support groups are there to help. You are not meant to do this alone.
You deserve to have the help and connection on this journey.
Transcribed by TurboScribe.ai.
These feelings are very normal. It might come from a phone call with a friend that leaves you feeling like you're missing out because your day-to-day life now revolves around baby feeding, and baby sick, and nappy changes, and they aren't the conversations that you're used to having with your old drinking buddy. You may feel financially insecure because you're living on a reduced income.
You and your partner may feel a strange sense of awkwardness about spending money, as if you've got to keep an eye on your general finances. You might feel like you aren't sure of who you are anymore. It's definitely worth having these conversations with your partner, friends, or family in advance of your baby's arrival to help lessen any insecurities that may arise or alleviate any worries that you might not yet know that you've got.
So, expectation versus reality. The reality can look different to the dream, and it's okay to mourn the loss of your pre-baby life, your connection to policing, your independence, or even the small things like just grabbing a coffee on a whim, or spending an hour just to yourself. And if you've got a partner that has returned to work, that adjustment period might feel even tougher.
This is all part of getting used to a new normal, and it takes time. Spotting the signs of postnatal depression for either parent. Now, it's essential to be aware of postnatal depression, anxiety, and psychosis, what they look like, and who it can affect.
The statistics are telling us that one in five new mums are diagnosed with some kind of postnatal depression, and one in ten dads are diagnosed with a depression as a result of having a baby. Now, the reason I'm sharing these statistics with you is so you are aware of just how common it is, and to help you understand that should you feel in any way more negative about parenthood than you thought you would, and you can't seem to shift that feeling, then it could be that there is some kind of postnatal depression kicking around, and it's absolutely okay to talk to your health visitor or GP about it. There should be no stigma attached to mental health anymore.
We know how common it is, and when hormones and life-changing events are at play, how this
can also shift things up a gear. You may speak to your GP, and what you feel may be totally normal, but it's better to check than to wait. You know you better than anyone else.
You know your partner better than anyone else. If something seems not quite within its realms of normal, then please support each other and seek support from either your GP or mental health professional. Hormones and emotional shifts.
Okay, we're going to talk about those hormones now. They play a huge part in the roller coaster of emotions that you might be feeling. In the space of a minute, you could be laughing, crying, and be furious all at the same time, and wondering what is going on.
This is totally normal, and it takes us by surprise. This is your body adjusting after a major event, so be patient with each other and be kind to yourself. Remember, these hormonal shifts are temporary, and you're both doing a great job navigating them and supporting each other.
Birth trauma or disappointment. I want to talk a bit about birth trauma and birth disappointment, as this is very personal to each individual, and it's very important to know that one person's trauma may be very different to someone else's. To some, it can be obvious in that there was a medically traumatic birth.
To others, it can simply be that the birth didn't go to plan, and they can't shape that disappointed feeling, and it's affecting their mental health. It's also important to recognise that it might not just be the birth mom who struggles with birth trauma, but the second parent watching everything unfold in front of them, while feeling helpless, can also experience trauma. If you end up with any negative feelings about the birth, please don't suffer in silence.
You can ask your midwife for a birth debrief, and if this doesn't help, you can always reach out to the BTA, that's the Birth Trauma Association, who may be able to help. You may also want to provide feedback on your experience via the local Maternity Voices Partnership or Patient Advice and Liaison Services. Talking about things is one of the best ways to lighten your mental load and start to make sense of things, so please utilise the support that is available.
Creating a network of support. One of the best things you can do is to create your own support network that is likely to include other new parents who've got similar interests to yourself. To have people to go on that journey with you can help in those solitary moments when you feel like it's just you going through something.
There are various ways to find your tribe, and a lot will depend on your personality as to which suits you best. If you're more of an introvert, you may choose to find a parent group online where people have similar interests to you. Alternatively, you may follow parent influences you like to feel a sense of solidarity.
If you're someone who needs people, then look for your local parenting groups. It could be a running group, yes they exist, baby sensory type classes, sing and sign or coffee meetups. You even get sling dance classes where you can dance with your baby in a sling.
There are dad groups where they might meet up and play football or just attend a baby class with other dads and their babies. It might be that you're looking for a specific LBGQT plus group and there will be ones in your area. If not in person, online.
You want to connect with people who you can have a conversation with that get you. So don't stick to the traditional baby classes, look for what you need. Where to get help if something feels off.
If at any point something just doesn't feel right or you're feeling persistently low, don't hesitate to reach out. Health visitors, GPs and local support groups are there to help. You are not meant to do this alone.
You deserve to have the help and connection on this journey.
Transcribed by TurboScribe.ai.
Creating attachment and bonding
Forming attachment from pregnancy. So, it's time to delve deeper into how we create attachment and bond with our babies.
We can start creating attachment while our baby is in utero, so when you see people talking to their baby bump, they aren't being crazy, they're actually cementing the first steps in bonding. We are with our babies all the time, and they hear our voices from the womb, and even though when babies are first born they can barely see, they can still turn to their parents through voice recognition. So, speak, sing, and even just chatting around your baby helps them to recognise your voice.
Start to visualise your little one and talk about how they will look, their hair colour, the things they might like to do when they grow up, and picture them in the outfits that you've picked for them. These conversations can help you as parents come closer together, as sometimes if there is a second parent they can feel a little pushed out as they aren't physically carrying the baby. These moments spent together talking about the future are wonderful for laying the foundations of bonding.
You may even choose to give your bump a name, but if you don't, that too is okay, it's not for everyone. Skin to skin and oxytocin. Now, let's talk about skin to skin contact, which is incredibly special.
You may hear a lot about how important skin to skin is for bonding, but let's delve into why that is. When your baby is close, hearing your heartbeat and feeling your warmth, it releases oxytocin, which is also known as the love hormone that deepens your bond, and this is for both parents too. Skin to skin is calming for both baby and parent, and it can help babies regulate their temperature, as they're unable to do this themselves until around 12 weeks old.
It can act as a pain reliever, so it can help in those fussy moments when their digestive system is getting used to digesting milk, and it might just be a little uncomfortable, or after they've had their immunizations. And it's not just skin to skin that creates oxytocin, eye contact and gentle touches can release oxytocin too. So when you're feeding them, changing them, or just gazing into their eyes, you're creating a strong connection, a safe environment for your baby.
Communication with your baby. Communication plays a big role in bonding, even though your baby can't respond in words, and I love this bit because I just think it's so interesting. But newborns can mimic certain gestures, like sticking out their tongue.
So slowly stick out your tongue, and then slowly bring it back in, and you might see them try to mirror you. It's amazing. Talking to your baby as you go through daily routines is wonderful for bonding too.
Let them know what you're doing. I'm going to change your nappy now, or it's time for a sleep. Simple phrases over time can become familiar to them, helping them to feel safe and comforted.
From six weeks, you could consider going to baby sign classes, as babies will be able to talk with their hands long before they're able to speak. Bonding ideas and trust. One of the most incredible things is a baby's first smile, which tends to start as a wind smile, but by six weeks, it's more of a responsive smile.
To make your baby smile and giggle can be the most incredible feeling, and the sound of their giggle is just so beautiful. Your baby will naturally love the attention and the cuddles from you, but is likely to be happy to accept cuddles from others, so use this to your advantage while you can. If you're feeling tired, it is perfectly fine to let someone else hold them.
It's a great opportunity to show that your baby, that they're safe and in loving arms, so when you hand your baby over, do it with confidence and a smile, because your baby picks up on your emotions, and if you feel confident, they feel confident and reassured. You want the early days of bonding to be the start of a beautiful journey. Attachment is the foundation of a trusting relationship, helping your baby feel secure, loved and comforted.
So enjoy these little moments and know that the warmth, skin-to-skin, eye contact and communication you share today will build a strong, loving bond that grows with every cuddle.
Transcribed by TurboScribe.ai.
We can start creating attachment while our baby is in utero, so when you see people talking to their baby bump, they aren't being crazy, they're actually cementing the first steps in bonding. We are with our babies all the time, and they hear our voices from the womb, and even though when babies are first born they can barely see, they can still turn to their parents through voice recognition. So, speak, sing, and even just chatting around your baby helps them to recognise your voice.
Start to visualise your little one and talk about how they will look, their hair colour, the things they might like to do when they grow up, and picture them in the outfits that you've picked for them. These conversations can help you as parents come closer together, as sometimes if there is a second parent they can feel a little pushed out as they aren't physically carrying the baby. These moments spent together talking about the future are wonderful for laying the foundations of bonding.
You may even choose to give your bump a name, but if you don't, that too is okay, it's not for everyone. Skin to skin and oxytocin. Now, let's talk about skin to skin contact, which is incredibly special.
You may hear a lot about how important skin to skin is for bonding, but let's delve into why that is. When your baby is close, hearing your heartbeat and feeling your warmth, it releases oxytocin, which is also known as the love hormone that deepens your bond, and this is for both parents too. Skin to skin is calming for both baby and parent, and it can help babies regulate their temperature, as they're unable to do this themselves until around 12 weeks old.
It can act as a pain reliever, so it can help in those fussy moments when their digestive system is getting used to digesting milk, and it might just be a little uncomfortable, or after they've had their immunizations. And it's not just skin to skin that creates oxytocin, eye contact and gentle touches can release oxytocin too. So when you're feeding them, changing them, or just gazing into their eyes, you're creating a strong connection, a safe environment for your baby.
Communication with your baby. Communication plays a big role in bonding, even though your baby can't respond in words, and I love this bit because I just think it's so interesting. But newborns can mimic certain gestures, like sticking out their tongue.
So slowly stick out your tongue, and then slowly bring it back in, and you might see them try to mirror you. It's amazing. Talking to your baby as you go through daily routines is wonderful for bonding too.
Let them know what you're doing. I'm going to change your nappy now, or it's time for a sleep. Simple phrases over time can become familiar to them, helping them to feel safe and comforted.
From six weeks, you could consider going to baby sign classes, as babies will be able to talk with their hands long before they're able to speak. Bonding ideas and trust. One of the most incredible things is a baby's first smile, which tends to start as a wind smile, but by six weeks, it's more of a responsive smile.
To make your baby smile and giggle can be the most incredible feeling, and the sound of their giggle is just so beautiful. Your baby will naturally love the attention and the cuddles from you, but is likely to be happy to accept cuddles from others, so use this to your advantage while you can. If you're feeling tired, it is perfectly fine to let someone else hold them.
It's a great opportunity to show that your baby, that they're safe and in loving arms, so when you hand your baby over, do it with confidence and a smile, because your baby picks up on your emotions, and if you feel confident, they feel confident and reassured. You want the early days of bonding to be the start of a beautiful journey. Attachment is the foundation of a trusting relationship, helping your baby feel secure, loved and comforted.
So enjoy these little moments and know that the warmth, skin-to-skin, eye contact and communication you share today will build a strong, loving bond that grows with every cuddle.
Transcribed by TurboScribe.ai.
Understanding sleep for babies and parents
In this section we will be focusing on the importance of sleep for both your new baby and for yourself. You may have heard at your antenatal classes that new babies sleep all of the time, which is kind of true, but they don't sleep in a way that suits an adult's needs.
If you've ever worked shifts, which I'm guessing many of you in policing have, until you go without sleep you have no idea how much the lack of it can affect you. So understanding the important role sleep plays for both baby and parents in advance of your baby's arrival is going to give you the chance to plan how you are all going to get the best sleep you can, especially if things don't quite go to plan. So newborn babies tend to sleep around 70 to 80 percent of the day, which sounds great right, but when they sleep in short stints of maybe one to two hours at a time and you're used to around a six to eight hour block, that broken sleep can really disrupt your natural rhythm and affect you in ways that you can't yet understand.
So let's talk about why sleep is so essential, what's happening while your baby sleeps, what's normal and let's look at how you can get a bit of rest too. So types of sleep and their importance. REM and non-REM.
So your newborn has two types of sleep. Rapid eye movement sleep, also known as REM sleep or active dream sleep and stage three non-REM sleep, non-rapid eye movement. Okay this is the deep slow wave sleep.
REM sleep is where much of their brain development happens and it's normal for babies to spend most of their sleep in this stage. During REM sleep blood flow to the brain increases, especially to the part that controls breathing. Non-REM sleep is where your baby is physically growing and their cells and immune system are developing.
So I think REM for brain development and non-REM for body restoration. So babies that sleep cycles are short and they sit at around 40 minutes each and they may wake up at the end of a cycle or two. These frequent wakings and lighter sleep are like an inbuilt safety mechanism thought to help reduce the risk of SIDS.
While it may be tiring for us as parents, these wake-ups are a healthy part of newborn sleep. However, sleep is vital for you as a parent too. It's easy to underestimate how much rest we actually need, so taking breaks and prioritising self-care when possible is essential.
We know that adults need a four-hour block of sleep to be in with a chance of functioning at any capacity during the day, which is why the short stints really do negatively affect our physical and our emotional state. Babies sleep needs and the lack of circadian rhythm. Babies aren't born with an established circadian rhythm and it can take up to 12 weeks for it to start to form.
In this time, they have got no sense of day or night and no ability to regulate their own body temperature. Babies can't produce their own melatonin, which is the sleep hormone, until around 12 weeks. To help move things on a little, you can introduce a pattern of about 12 hours of noise and activity during the day and 12 hours of dim light and quiet at night.
For breastfeeding parents, your nighttime milk contains melatonin and tryptophan, which can help kick-start this natural rhythm for your baby. The other thing that starts to happen from around 12 weeks is that the sleep architecture starts to mature and new sleep stages become more obvious, with non-REM stages 1 and 2 creeping in. These are the stages that babies develop where the baby transitions from an awake state to a sleep state, rather than just dropping straight into non-REM 3. Why babies nap? In the early days, babies can only stay awake for short periods before they need another nap.
That short period may be as short as just 30 to 40 minutes. Their brains are working hard to process the world around them, the sounds, smells, the sights they experience. Every time they nap, their brain is consolidating and processing these new experiences.
So as much as it feels like they're always asleep, they're actually busy learning and growing. Understanding that frequent wake-ups are a natural part of baby sleep can make it easier to accept. Everything always feels easier when you understand the why.
The why doesn't fix things, but you may feel like you can give yourself permission to have yourself an early night, or be kinder to yourself on the days you feel a little more stressed and emotional than normal. So let's look at some ways to get better sleep for everyone. So number one, sleep when your baby sleeps.
You've probably heard this before, as it's quite a common phrase suggesting resting when baby does. If you can grab a nap, then great, but it's not always that easy. But at least try not to be racing around and tiring yourself out with babies asleep.
The dishes can wait, and you will be a better parent when you're rested. Let friends or family help with household tasks. You can take a breather.
It is so easy to try and take on the household chores as the stay-at-home parent, as we tell ourselves that that's what we should do as our partners at work. The realistic truth is that being at home with a new baby is no easy task. And if you have a partner that works, even if they are working shifts, they may be feeling better rested than you.
So there is no reason that they can't chip in with the laundry or washing pots when they get home. Start as you mean to go on, as it is so easy to fall into the trap of doing everything while at home and continuing with this pattern when you're back at work, which is hard to change. And it can also add a lot of additional pressure.
Embrace white noise. White noise replicates the familiar sound of the womb, which can be really comforting for babies. Using white noise during naps and bedtime can help soothe them
and ease them to sleep.
You probably won't need it long term, but it can be really helpful during these first few months. Try skin-to-skin. Skin-to-skin contact is great for bonding, and it has an added benefit as it's a natural pain reliever.
So if your baby is fussy or seems uncomfortable, holding them skin-to-skin can provide comfort, whether they're in discomfort from digestion or that they just need calming. This can also help you as the parent if you're feeling slightly anxious. Take the time with your baby to breathe in that new baby smell, touch their skin, look into their eyes, and just be with your baby in those calm moments.
Look for the tired cues. Learn to recognise your baby's early tired signs like yawning, looking distant, disinterested or fussy. Responding early can help you avoid over-tiredness and dysregulation, and that will help make it easier settling them to sleep.
If you're seeing ear-pulling, eye-rubbing, grizzliness, multiple yawns or they're crying, you've possibly missed their window and they will need some extra help to settle down and fall asleep with more support. Swaddling. Some babies like to be swaddled as the tight and secure feeling they get is similar to when they're in the womb.
If you do decide to swaddle, use a light muslin cloth and make sure it's loose around their hips, stops at the shoulders and doesn't cover the baby's face. You can find examples on how to swaddle safely at the Lullaby Trust website. Aim to stop swaddling by 12 weeks or once your baby starts rolling for their safety.
Baby massage and movement. Gently massaging your baby or using bicycle leg movement can help with gas and promote relaxation. There are even classes available in person or online for baby massage and reflexology, which can be a really nice bonding activity and help ease any physical discomfort for your baby.
Sleep in shifts, and it might not feel like the natural thing to do to separate from your partner in the evening, but you both need to make sleep a priority as this is going to help you in regulating your emotions, which will make communicating with each other more effective and help both parents' mental health. We need a four-hour block of sleep to help us feel restored and as babies tend not to sleep for that long in the early days, this broken sleep can negatively impact us. So for the short term, take sleep in shifts so you both get the chance to have that four-hour block.
If you're breastfeeding, seek advice from your midwife or health visitor to see if it will be right for your circumstances. Things will look different for each family, but it could be that one parent sleeps from 9pm till 1am while parent two is in with the baby and parent two can still go to bed but they just deal with any wake-ups before 1am and from 1am parent one takes over the night wakes, but they will feel better because they've had some sleep and they'll be able to grab extra
chunks in the night. You will find your rhythm, so just try different things but discuss how you think it may look before your baby arrives.
Self-care. You have no doubt heard the saying that if the plane was going down, you need to put your own oxygen mask on first before helping others. This is no different to parenting.
If you don't even make it onto your to-do list and you forget to look after yourself, then you are going to be trying to parent with little oxygen and this will run out soon as there won't be much left of you to give to others. Even if you only find 15 minutes a day to do something that is just for you, then do it. A nice walk, taking up a home hobby, chatting to a friend or even some time to meditate can make all the difference to how you feel and how you sleep.
Transcribed by TurboScribe.ai.
If you've ever worked shifts, which I'm guessing many of you in policing have, until you go without sleep you have no idea how much the lack of it can affect you. So understanding the important role sleep plays for both baby and parents in advance of your baby's arrival is going to give you the chance to plan how you are all going to get the best sleep you can, especially if things don't quite go to plan. So newborn babies tend to sleep around 70 to 80 percent of the day, which sounds great right, but when they sleep in short stints of maybe one to two hours at a time and you're used to around a six to eight hour block, that broken sleep can really disrupt your natural rhythm and affect you in ways that you can't yet understand.
So let's talk about why sleep is so essential, what's happening while your baby sleeps, what's normal and let's look at how you can get a bit of rest too. So types of sleep and their importance. REM and non-REM.
So your newborn has two types of sleep. Rapid eye movement sleep, also known as REM sleep or active dream sleep and stage three non-REM sleep, non-rapid eye movement. Okay this is the deep slow wave sleep.
REM sleep is where much of their brain development happens and it's normal for babies to spend most of their sleep in this stage. During REM sleep blood flow to the brain increases, especially to the part that controls breathing. Non-REM sleep is where your baby is physically growing and their cells and immune system are developing.
So I think REM for brain development and non-REM for body restoration. So babies that sleep cycles are short and they sit at around 40 minutes each and they may wake up at the end of a cycle or two. These frequent wakings and lighter sleep are like an inbuilt safety mechanism thought to help reduce the risk of SIDS.
While it may be tiring for us as parents, these wake-ups are a healthy part of newborn sleep. However, sleep is vital for you as a parent too. It's easy to underestimate how much rest we actually need, so taking breaks and prioritising self-care when possible is essential.
We know that adults need a four-hour block of sleep to be in with a chance of functioning at any capacity during the day, which is why the short stints really do negatively affect our physical and our emotional state. Babies sleep needs and the lack of circadian rhythm. Babies aren't born with an established circadian rhythm and it can take up to 12 weeks for it to start to form.
In this time, they have got no sense of day or night and no ability to regulate their own body temperature. Babies can't produce their own melatonin, which is the sleep hormone, until around 12 weeks. To help move things on a little, you can introduce a pattern of about 12 hours of noise and activity during the day and 12 hours of dim light and quiet at night.
For breastfeeding parents, your nighttime milk contains melatonin and tryptophan, which can help kick-start this natural rhythm for your baby. The other thing that starts to happen from around 12 weeks is that the sleep architecture starts to mature and new sleep stages become more obvious, with non-REM stages 1 and 2 creeping in. These are the stages that babies develop where the baby transitions from an awake state to a sleep state, rather than just dropping straight into non-REM 3. Why babies nap? In the early days, babies can only stay awake for short periods before they need another nap.
That short period may be as short as just 30 to 40 minutes. Their brains are working hard to process the world around them, the sounds, smells, the sights they experience. Every time they nap, their brain is consolidating and processing these new experiences.
So as much as it feels like they're always asleep, they're actually busy learning and growing. Understanding that frequent wake-ups are a natural part of baby sleep can make it easier to accept. Everything always feels easier when you understand the why.
The why doesn't fix things, but you may feel like you can give yourself permission to have yourself an early night, or be kinder to yourself on the days you feel a little more stressed and emotional than normal. So let's look at some ways to get better sleep for everyone. So number one, sleep when your baby sleeps.
You've probably heard this before, as it's quite a common phrase suggesting resting when baby does. If you can grab a nap, then great, but it's not always that easy. But at least try not to be racing around and tiring yourself out with babies asleep.
The dishes can wait, and you will be a better parent when you're rested. Let friends or family help with household tasks. You can take a breather.
It is so easy to try and take on the household chores as the stay-at-home parent, as we tell ourselves that that's what we should do as our partners at work. The realistic truth is that being at home with a new baby is no easy task. And if you have a partner that works, even if they are working shifts, they may be feeling better rested than you.
So there is no reason that they can't chip in with the laundry or washing pots when they get home. Start as you mean to go on, as it is so easy to fall into the trap of doing everything while at home and continuing with this pattern when you're back at work, which is hard to change. And it can also add a lot of additional pressure.
Embrace white noise. White noise replicates the familiar sound of the womb, which can be really comforting for babies. Using white noise during naps and bedtime can help soothe them
and ease them to sleep.
You probably won't need it long term, but it can be really helpful during these first few months. Try skin-to-skin. Skin-to-skin contact is great for bonding, and it has an added benefit as it's a natural pain reliever.
So if your baby is fussy or seems uncomfortable, holding them skin-to-skin can provide comfort, whether they're in discomfort from digestion or that they just need calming. This can also help you as the parent if you're feeling slightly anxious. Take the time with your baby to breathe in that new baby smell, touch their skin, look into their eyes, and just be with your baby in those calm moments.
Look for the tired cues. Learn to recognise your baby's early tired signs like yawning, looking distant, disinterested or fussy. Responding early can help you avoid over-tiredness and dysregulation, and that will help make it easier settling them to sleep.
If you're seeing ear-pulling, eye-rubbing, grizzliness, multiple yawns or they're crying, you've possibly missed their window and they will need some extra help to settle down and fall asleep with more support. Swaddling. Some babies like to be swaddled as the tight and secure feeling they get is similar to when they're in the womb.
If you do decide to swaddle, use a light muslin cloth and make sure it's loose around their hips, stops at the shoulders and doesn't cover the baby's face. You can find examples on how to swaddle safely at the Lullaby Trust website. Aim to stop swaddling by 12 weeks or once your baby starts rolling for their safety.
Baby massage and movement. Gently massaging your baby or using bicycle leg movement can help with gas and promote relaxation. There are even classes available in person or online for baby massage and reflexology, which can be a really nice bonding activity and help ease any physical discomfort for your baby.
Sleep in shifts, and it might not feel like the natural thing to do to separate from your partner in the evening, but you both need to make sleep a priority as this is going to help you in regulating your emotions, which will make communicating with each other more effective and help both parents' mental health. We need a four-hour block of sleep to help us feel restored and as babies tend not to sleep for that long in the early days, this broken sleep can negatively impact us. So for the short term, take sleep in shifts so you both get the chance to have that four-hour block.
If you're breastfeeding, seek advice from your midwife or health visitor to see if it will be right for your circumstances. Things will look different for each family, but it could be that one parent sleeps from 9pm till 1am while parent two is in with the baby and parent two can still go to bed but they just deal with any wake-ups before 1am and from 1am parent one takes over the night wakes, but they will feel better because they've had some sleep and they'll be able to grab extra
chunks in the night. You will find your rhythm, so just try different things but discuss how you think it may look before your baby arrives.
Self-care. You have no doubt heard the saying that if the plane was going down, you need to put your own oxygen mask on first before helping others. This is no different to parenting.
If you don't even make it onto your to-do list and you forget to look after yourself, then you are going to be trying to parent with little oxygen and this will run out soon as there won't be much left of you to give to others. Even if you only find 15 minutes a day to do something that is just for you, then do it. A nice walk, taking up a home hobby, chatting to a friend or even some time to meditate can make all the difference to how you feel and how you sleep.
Transcribed by TurboScribe.ai.
Safe sleeping and co-sleeping
This section is where we focus in on safe sleep for newborns and talk through co-sleeping. Even if you don't plan to co-sleep, studies show that around 80% of parents end up doing it at some point, so it's important to know how to do it safely.
Let's talk about creating a safe sleep environment for your little one, reducing SIDS risks and making choices that support both baby and parent. It's also hugely important to discuss safe sleeping with family members or friends who may at times be looking after baby and who may have done things differently and may not be up to date with the latest and safest science. So safe sleep basics.
A firm flat mattress. Start with a firm flat mattress that is waterproof and in good condition. This provides a safe and supportive surface for your baby.
Make sure to place your baby on their back to sleep with their feet at the foot of the crib. This position lowers the risk of SIDS by preventing baby from rolling onto their stomachs or shuffling under blankets. A clear cot.
Keep the crib free of items like comforters, muslins and toys. If you're using a blanket, place it low at the bottom of the crib and tuck it securely to avoid any loose material near your baby's face. The safest setup is always a clear cot.
Room temperature. The ideal room temperature for safe sleep is 16 to 20 degrees centigrade. If this is challenging to maintain, especially in warmer months or in new build homes, adjust your baby's clothing.
In older properties, if they're drafty, try not to put baby's crib near to an open door, for example one that leads to a hallway. The Lullaby Trust offers helpful guides on what to dress your baby in at different temperatures. Choosing safe sleeping products.
If you're using a sleeping bag or a swaddle, make sure it meets British safety standards. Some sleeping bags can pose risks as they have a wide neck opening, so always check for the safety certification tag. This prevents risks of suffocation or strangulation and it is so important to be selective about these products, even if they are widely available.
Room sharing. Keep your baby in the same room with you for the first six months, both for naps and for nighttime sleep. This proximity helps reduce SIDS risks and it's perfectly fine for you to keep your baby close to you as long as you feel is right for you.
There is no rule that says that your baby must go into their own room at six months. Avoid unsafe sleep setups, so car seats and sofa naps. Use car seats only for short-term naps during travel.
When you reach your destination, transfer your baby to a crib or safe sleep space to continue sleeping safely. Sofa naps can be especially risky as gaps and soft cushions increase the risk of suffocation. If you feel tired, move to a safe sleeping area to rest.
Avoiding pods and nests. While they may look cosy and are widely available on the market, pods and nests are not recommended for safe sleep. Babies can roll over and get stuck against the side and they have got no ability to roll back.
This is the same for cot bumpers when they move into their main cot. Cot bumpers are a suffocation risk, so please do not use them. If you choose to use nests or pods, please always supervise your baby.
Avoiding smoke exposure. Ensure no one smokes around your baby as smoke exposure increases the risk of SIDS. Safe co-sleeping.
Let's talk about co-sleeping. So before 2023, co-sleeping was generally recommended only for breastfeeding parents, but we know that sleep deprivation can push any parent to bring their baby into bed and it is essential to know how to do it safely. Even if you think you'll never co- sleep, it's hard to predict those early hours when you're exhausted and you just need to rest.
So basic safety tips for co-sleeping. If you choose to co-sleep, remember no smoking, alcohol, medication that causes drowsiness, other children or pets in the bed. Do not co-sleep if you are extremely tired as you could fall into a very deep sleep and this is dangerous with a sleeping baby next to you as you could roll onto your baby and not wake up.
If your partner is working long shifts in the police and you know that they are tired, it might be a good idea for them to sleep elsewhere. This also goes for feeding your baby sitting up. Please make sure you are fully awake when feeding and if you are extremely sleep deprived, make sure you've got somebody supervising you to make sure you don't fall asleep feeding.
These can all increase the risk of accidental injury to your baby. It's also important to have your bed clear of pillows and duvets as these pose a suffocation risk. It doesn't sound too appealing, I know, but this is why it's important to have the facts in advance to make sure co-sleeping isn't done unsafely out of desperation.
Choose what works for you. Some parents love co-sleeping and find it enhances bonding and gives everyone better sleep, while others prefer or need to have space to move around freely. Co-sleeping can be a wonderful choice if done safely, but if you find yourself doing it out of desperation due to sleep struggles, consider reaching out for support.
You never know if there is something going on medically that could have been missed. Save co- sleeping setup. So, in a nutshell, to co-sleep safely, place your baby on a firm mattress, not a pillow top, with no gaps between the bed and the wall where they could get stuck.
Be aware of your surroundings and avoid co-sleeping if you are extremely tired, your baby has
a temperature, and please get confirmation from a medical professional that you are safe to co- sleep with your baby should they have been born premature, which is classed as earlier than 37 weeks, or has a low birth weight of 5.5 pounds or less. Let's talk about safe baby wearing. So, baby wearing is an excellent way to promote bonding.
Allow parental freedom while giving your baby the opportunity to nap on the go. However, we need to be mindful that, as with anything, there are safety guidelines we need to discuss. If you are ever unsure what they are, think ticks, okay? Make sure your baby is tight, that's your T. Slings and carriers should be tight enough to hug your baby close to you, and this will be most comfortable for both of you.
If it's too loose, your baby may slump down into the carrier, which can both hinder their breathing, and it can pull on your back. Make sure your baby is in view at all times, that's your I, in, in view at all times. You should always be able to see your baby's face by simply glancing down and not having to move any fabric.
Your baby should be close enough to kiss, that's your C. Your baby's head should be as close to your chin as comfortable. You should be able to kiss your baby's head or forehead comfortably by just moving your head forward and down slightly. Always keep your baby's chin off their chest, that's your K. Keep your baby's chin off their chest.
A baby should never be curled up or slumped as this allows their chin to sit on their chest. Please make sure there is at least one finger's width under their chin to prevent their airway being blocked and restricting their breathing. Always make sure their back is supported, that's your S, supported.
Always make sure your baby is in upright position with their back supported and it's in their natural position and their tummy and chest against you. Ideal napping arrangements. It's recommended to supervise all sleeps until your baby is around six months old.
For daytime naps, keeping your baby in the living room with you can work well but sometimes around four months they become more alert and have to work that bit harder to fall asleep as they've got their stages one and two non-REM to move through before reaching a sleep state. At this stage you may find that your baby responds better to the cot that they sleep in at night where it's dark for sleep. If you choose to let your baby nap in a separate room to yourself, use a video monitor and check on them frequently.
If you would prefer to keep your baby with you for all sleeps as per the safety guidelines, you may find using a sling for naps is very helpful as your baby can sleep safe next to you and you can still have your hands free to eat if you wish or head out for a walk and get yourself some exercise and maybe chat to a friend while having that walk while your baby sleeps. It is possible to safely breastfeed your baby in slings such as ring slings but please do not try hands-free breastfeeding as this can lead to potential suffocation. Always support the baby's head and back, ideally sit down if you can and adjust the sling so your baby's in their normal position for
breastfeeding.
Breastfeed them as normal while supporting them with your arm and once you've finished feeding them adjust the sling and move them back into an upright position, making sure that they are tight, that you can see their face without moving any fabric, you are close enough to kiss their head and that their chin is off their chest, that their back is supported and that they're fully upright. As there are a wide range of sling styles for different needs and body types, I would recommend looking for a sling library in your area and reach out for some personal advice. If there isn't one near you, you may find there's a baby wearing consultant nearby or at least someone that you could have an online consult with.
Car naps, for naps during travel be sure to take your baby out of the car seat when you arrive at your destination. Car seats are not designed for long sleep stretches and moving your baby to a crib or a basinette is the safest choice once you've stopped. As with the sling it is important to make sure your car seat is positioned correctly so your baby's chin is not resting on their chest as this can obstruct their airway.
So we're going to talk about pram naps. Getting out and about for at least 20 minutes a day in natural daylight can be very beneficial for sleep for both baby and parent. This is where it can be helpful to use the pram especially in the early days if recovering from a birth experience such as a c-section as you may not feel strong enough to walk with the sling and the pram is a good aid to help you exercise and get moving.
It's also nice for that stability. However we do need to cover up a few sleep safety basics as babies do tend to enjoy the motion and nap on the go. You need to make sure that your baby is not too hot or too cold so a good rule of thumb to follow is one layer more than you are wearing.
Babies lose heat through their head so when it's cold make sure they're wearing a hat but when moving indoors please remove the hat as this can cause them to overheat as babies are unable to regulate their body temperature. Please do not cover the opening of the pram with a blanket or a muslin as this limits the air circulation and during the hot days it can cause the pram to overheat. If you are looking to block out the sun in the summer please use something such as a snooze shade which has been tested to provide both shade and is breathable and in winter try using the rain cover to block out the wind of the cold.
It is absolutely fine for your baby to nap on their pram but please always make sure they are supervised in any layers removed when moving indoors to meet the temperature of the room that they are in. Prams are not meant for overnight sleeping so please do keep to naps. If you wish to you can move your baby from their pram to the basket when coming indoors but this isn't essential as long as you have eyes on them.
Check their temperature regularly, take down the hood and make sure they are dressed to room temperature. Please do not ever cover their face, blankets should be tucked in at the top
of their chest so their face is exposed. So in conclusion safe sleep practices whether in a crib, sling, pram or through co-sleeping are all about finding what works for you while keeping safety top of mind.
Remember you can always check with resources like the Lullaby Trust for more guidance on safe sleep and don't hesitate to reach out for support if you need it. Whatever sleep approach you choose make sure it feels right for you and your baby and prioritise both safety and comfort.
Transcribed by TurboScribe.ai.
Let's talk about creating a safe sleep environment for your little one, reducing SIDS risks and making choices that support both baby and parent. It's also hugely important to discuss safe sleeping with family members or friends who may at times be looking after baby and who may have done things differently and may not be up to date with the latest and safest science. So safe sleep basics.
A firm flat mattress. Start with a firm flat mattress that is waterproof and in good condition. This provides a safe and supportive surface for your baby.
Make sure to place your baby on their back to sleep with their feet at the foot of the crib. This position lowers the risk of SIDS by preventing baby from rolling onto their stomachs or shuffling under blankets. A clear cot.
Keep the crib free of items like comforters, muslins and toys. If you're using a blanket, place it low at the bottom of the crib and tuck it securely to avoid any loose material near your baby's face. The safest setup is always a clear cot.
Room temperature. The ideal room temperature for safe sleep is 16 to 20 degrees centigrade. If this is challenging to maintain, especially in warmer months or in new build homes, adjust your baby's clothing.
In older properties, if they're drafty, try not to put baby's crib near to an open door, for example one that leads to a hallway. The Lullaby Trust offers helpful guides on what to dress your baby in at different temperatures. Choosing safe sleeping products.
If you're using a sleeping bag or a swaddle, make sure it meets British safety standards. Some sleeping bags can pose risks as they have a wide neck opening, so always check for the safety certification tag. This prevents risks of suffocation or strangulation and it is so important to be selective about these products, even if they are widely available.
Room sharing. Keep your baby in the same room with you for the first six months, both for naps and for nighttime sleep. This proximity helps reduce SIDS risks and it's perfectly fine for you to keep your baby close to you as long as you feel is right for you.
There is no rule that says that your baby must go into their own room at six months. Avoid unsafe sleep setups, so car seats and sofa naps. Use car seats only for short-term naps during travel.
When you reach your destination, transfer your baby to a crib or safe sleep space to continue sleeping safely. Sofa naps can be especially risky as gaps and soft cushions increase the risk of suffocation. If you feel tired, move to a safe sleeping area to rest.
Avoiding pods and nests. While they may look cosy and are widely available on the market, pods and nests are not recommended for safe sleep. Babies can roll over and get stuck against the side and they have got no ability to roll back.
This is the same for cot bumpers when they move into their main cot. Cot bumpers are a suffocation risk, so please do not use them. If you choose to use nests or pods, please always supervise your baby.
Avoiding smoke exposure. Ensure no one smokes around your baby as smoke exposure increases the risk of SIDS. Safe co-sleeping.
Let's talk about co-sleeping. So before 2023, co-sleeping was generally recommended only for breastfeeding parents, but we know that sleep deprivation can push any parent to bring their baby into bed and it is essential to know how to do it safely. Even if you think you'll never co- sleep, it's hard to predict those early hours when you're exhausted and you just need to rest.
So basic safety tips for co-sleeping. If you choose to co-sleep, remember no smoking, alcohol, medication that causes drowsiness, other children or pets in the bed. Do not co-sleep if you are extremely tired as you could fall into a very deep sleep and this is dangerous with a sleeping baby next to you as you could roll onto your baby and not wake up.
If your partner is working long shifts in the police and you know that they are tired, it might be a good idea for them to sleep elsewhere. This also goes for feeding your baby sitting up. Please make sure you are fully awake when feeding and if you are extremely sleep deprived, make sure you've got somebody supervising you to make sure you don't fall asleep feeding.
These can all increase the risk of accidental injury to your baby. It's also important to have your bed clear of pillows and duvets as these pose a suffocation risk. It doesn't sound too appealing, I know, but this is why it's important to have the facts in advance to make sure co-sleeping isn't done unsafely out of desperation.
Choose what works for you. Some parents love co-sleeping and find it enhances bonding and gives everyone better sleep, while others prefer or need to have space to move around freely. Co-sleeping can be a wonderful choice if done safely, but if you find yourself doing it out of desperation due to sleep struggles, consider reaching out for support.
You never know if there is something going on medically that could have been missed. Save co- sleeping setup. So, in a nutshell, to co-sleep safely, place your baby on a firm mattress, not a pillow top, with no gaps between the bed and the wall where they could get stuck.
Be aware of your surroundings and avoid co-sleeping if you are extremely tired, your baby has
a temperature, and please get confirmation from a medical professional that you are safe to co- sleep with your baby should they have been born premature, which is classed as earlier than 37 weeks, or has a low birth weight of 5.5 pounds or less. Let's talk about safe baby wearing. So, baby wearing is an excellent way to promote bonding.
Allow parental freedom while giving your baby the opportunity to nap on the go. However, we need to be mindful that, as with anything, there are safety guidelines we need to discuss. If you are ever unsure what they are, think ticks, okay? Make sure your baby is tight, that's your T. Slings and carriers should be tight enough to hug your baby close to you, and this will be most comfortable for both of you.
If it's too loose, your baby may slump down into the carrier, which can both hinder their breathing, and it can pull on your back. Make sure your baby is in view at all times, that's your I, in, in view at all times. You should always be able to see your baby's face by simply glancing down and not having to move any fabric.
Your baby should be close enough to kiss, that's your C. Your baby's head should be as close to your chin as comfortable. You should be able to kiss your baby's head or forehead comfortably by just moving your head forward and down slightly. Always keep your baby's chin off their chest, that's your K. Keep your baby's chin off their chest.
A baby should never be curled up or slumped as this allows their chin to sit on their chest. Please make sure there is at least one finger's width under their chin to prevent their airway being blocked and restricting their breathing. Always make sure their back is supported, that's your S, supported.
Always make sure your baby is in upright position with their back supported and it's in their natural position and their tummy and chest against you. Ideal napping arrangements. It's recommended to supervise all sleeps until your baby is around six months old.
For daytime naps, keeping your baby in the living room with you can work well but sometimes around four months they become more alert and have to work that bit harder to fall asleep as they've got their stages one and two non-REM to move through before reaching a sleep state. At this stage you may find that your baby responds better to the cot that they sleep in at night where it's dark for sleep. If you choose to let your baby nap in a separate room to yourself, use a video monitor and check on them frequently.
If you would prefer to keep your baby with you for all sleeps as per the safety guidelines, you may find using a sling for naps is very helpful as your baby can sleep safe next to you and you can still have your hands free to eat if you wish or head out for a walk and get yourself some exercise and maybe chat to a friend while having that walk while your baby sleeps. It is possible to safely breastfeed your baby in slings such as ring slings but please do not try hands-free breastfeeding as this can lead to potential suffocation. Always support the baby's head and back, ideally sit down if you can and adjust the sling so your baby's in their normal position for
breastfeeding.
Breastfeed them as normal while supporting them with your arm and once you've finished feeding them adjust the sling and move them back into an upright position, making sure that they are tight, that you can see their face without moving any fabric, you are close enough to kiss their head and that their chin is off their chest, that their back is supported and that they're fully upright. As there are a wide range of sling styles for different needs and body types, I would recommend looking for a sling library in your area and reach out for some personal advice. If there isn't one near you, you may find there's a baby wearing consultant nearby or at least someone that you could have an online consult with.
Car naps, for naps during travel be sure to take your baby out of the car seat when you arrive at your destination. Car seats are not designed for long sleep stretches and moving your baby to a crib or a basinette is the safest choice once you've stopped. As with the sling it is important to make sure your car seat is positioned correctly so your baby's chin is not resting on their chest as this can obstruct their airway.
So we're going to talk about pram naps. Getting out and about for at least 20 minutes a day in natural daylight can be very beneficial for sleep for both baby and parent. This is where it can be helpful to use the pram especially in the early days if recovering from a birth experience such as a c-section as you may not feel strong enough to walk with the sling and the pram is a good aid to help you exercise and get moving.
It's also nice for that stability. However we do need to cover up a few sleep safety basics as babies do tend to enjoy the motion and nap on the go. You need to make sure that your baby is not too hot or too cold so a good rule of thumb to follow is one layer more than you are wearing.
Babies lose heat through their head so when it's cold make sure they're wearing a hat but when moving indoors please remove the hat as this can cause them to overheat as babies are unable to regulate their body temperature. Please do not cover the opening of the pram with a blanket or a muslin as this limits the air circulation and during the hot days it can cause the pram to overheat. If you are looking to block out the sun in the summer please use something such as a snooze shade which has been tested to provide both shade and is breathable and in winter try using the rain cover to block out the wind of the cold.
It is absolutely fine for your baby to nap on their pram but please always make sure they are supervised in any layers removed when moving indoors to meet the temperature of the room that they are in. Prams are not meant for overnight sleeping so please do keep to naps. If you wish to you can move your baby from their pram to the basket when coming indoors but this isn't essential as long as you have eyes on them.
Check their temperature regularly, take down the hood and make sure they are dressed to room temperature. Please do not ever cover their face, blankets should be tucked in at the top
of their chest so their face is exposed. So in conclusion safe sleep practices whether in a crib, sling, pram or through co-sleeping are all about finding what works for you while keeping safety top of mind.
Remember you can always check with resources like the Lullaby Trust for more guidance on safe sleep and don't hesitate to reach out for support if you need it. Whatever sleep approach you choose make sure it feels right for you and your baby and prioritise both safety and comfort.
Transcribed by TurboScribe.ai.
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